Inge was deeply engrossed in thought. She still remembered
that day about seven years back ,11th August 2011. Jagannath had barely
completed two years at CADRC. For his research and remarkable work in
neuro-immunology, He was honoured with Dr. Zaven Kachaturian Award. He was the
first fellow of CADRC to receive this award at the age of just 37. After that,
within a few years, Jagannath's name became very famous in the field of
Alzheimer's. The same Jagannath was fighting for his life against Alzheimer’s.
What a tragedy! Inge for a moment thought of Mrunmayi and Soumya who were
waiting in the Hospital lounge since last night. Frightened and vulnerable
Soumya was just twelve years old. Now it is 11:45 PM.26th of November 2019,
Kartik Amavasya, Soon it will be Margashirsha Pratipada, 27th November 2019.
Jagannath's 46th birthday.
Mrunmayi was sitting in the lounge couch thinking and
brooding. Soumya had fallen asleep some time ago with his head on her shoulder.
For the past six months, Jagannath was in the CADRC hospital bed. Initially,
the brilliant minded Jagannath started forgetting small things. Mrunmayi
thought that he might be getting forgetful because of his busy schedule and
work stress. Then slowly this forgetfulness increased.
On that fateful day Jagannath called her at 5 PM. He was
calling from Soumya's school. “Hello Mrun, these guys are telling me that
Soumya's cultural program was over six months ago! Didn’t you remind me
yesterday to come directly from work to his school today?” There was so
much confusion in his voice.
The next morning, they both went to Inge in the hospital. His
first test reports came in the evening. Jagannath had all the symptoms of Alzheimer’s.
Generally, it takes 4 to 6 years to reach from the first stage to the sixth
stage. But Jagannath's Alzheimer's had crossed all these stages in less than
two years. Jagannath loved speed, like him Alzheimer was speeding on him. Six
months ago, Jagannath started having trouble eating and drinking. Inge shifted
him to the hospital. She was personally taking his care .
In the last 10 years, the Sukhthankar family had a lot of
support from her. Right from finding a home for them to Soumya's school
admission. Mrunmayi felt that she was not only a great sister-in-law but also a
loving mother-in-law. It was as if goddess Shanta Durga, their kuladevi (family
deity) was taking care of them here in America in the form of Inge. Even though
Jagannath was settled here in America, he never missed the Rath Yatra of Shanta
Durga on the Big Panchami (Kavlem - Goa) and did not miss it even during his
illness until now . Even last year they all had gone to take darshan. Inge was
also with them. For the past seven years, she had also accompanied them without
fail. Born in German culture and brought up in American culture, Yet Inge had
easily assimilated into Sukhthankar's Goan-Indian culture in the last ten years.
Inge had celebrated all the festivals like Diwali festival, Bhau Beej, New
Year(Padwa), and Ganapati festival with great enthusiasm and love along with
the Sukhthankar family. The time they spent together was passing before
Mrunmayi's eyes. She was resting on the sofa with her eyes closed. Soumya was
sleeping peacefully next to her.
The ICU was in isolated silence. Jagannath was on ventilator.
Only an occasional nurse who came in to take his vitals and the whir of the AC
was all that was there. Everything else was calm and cool. But Inge had not had
a shut-eye for the last 18 hours. She was monitoring Jagannath through big the
glass window of her cabin. Her eyes were welling up but she was not letting the
tears win.
For the past six months she had held back her tears, just to
keep away Mrunmayi from collapsing! She constantly comforted Mrun (Jagan
affectionately called Mrunmayi, “Mrun”) keeping her grief own aside. She always
saw Albert in Jagan. Albert was her younger brother, handsome, curly haired,
tall and muscular. How dignified and elegant he looked in Airforce pilot's
attire. Albert was obsessed with speed. So, he joined Airforce. He always bet
on speed! One day he lost…
Jagan is also fast, not in the physical sense but mental. The
leap and speed at which his mind processed thoughts and equations was just
incredible. He is a super computer, but
alas! Not anymore. He is a vegetable now!
What had happened in the last two years, what bad omen had
gripped Jagan? His mental genius was brought to a grinding halt by Alzheimer's.
Inge couldn’t bring herself up to watch Jagan’s condition in the last six
months, He was engulfed in his own urine and faeces. Awaiting liberation, but
it wasn’t coming yet! How much more had he to suffer through this? Inge had
felt his agony, his shame, his anger, his helplessness, his anxiety in Jagan's
eyes.His eyes were staring at death, pleading to liberate him but death wasn’t
having any mercy on him. It was not embracing him.
Inge asked Shanta Durga in her mind, “Mother, how many
more days does he have to suffer this torture? Why is death taking him so
slowly moment by moment? Don't you pity your son? Rescue him from this lifeless
life quickly! Free him mother free him”.
Inge didn't realize when a tear fell from her eye. She
recovered herself and got up from the chair with a determination. It was
already 6:00 AM in the clock. Hey, today is 27th November 2019, Jagan's 46th
birthday. Like last year, she was going to give him his birthday gift this year
too.
Jagannath was sleeping peacefully. Time didn’t mean anything
to him now, He had no measure of it and neither had any desire to know. All
that was left was an awareness of being. All he felt was an engulfing silence
everywhere, warm coldness, thick darkness and some kind of whir emanating from
somewhere. Slowly, he felt a spot of white light approaching from afar through
the darkness. Slowly, that white light was getting bigger and bigger. Shanta
Durga had actually come to meet him in that beautiful serene and unfathomable
white light before him. Thrill rose on his body; He realized that tears of joy
were flowing from his eyes. Suddenly Shanta Durga metamorphosed into Inge, she
had the same charming smile and the eyes of Shanta Durga. Eyes that were filled
with love and compassion, “but this is Inge! " For a second, he was
confused. “When did Inge become Shanta Durga?" His mind was asking
himself. He couldn’t differentiate between reality and illusion everything was
a blur. He bowed down to Shanta Durga. He saw a blue flame emanating from his
body and merging with Shanta Durga. Now everything felt lighter. It was like
being freed from a prison. There was liberation at last. He was flying. He
looked down instinctively. Below was a beautiful snowy landscape, in which
there was a small hut amongst the forest. The Pratipada Sun of Margashirsha was
rising on the horizon with all its splendour. Jagan saluted to that divine blooming
radiance
Inge stealthily retracted syringe needle from the saline infusion bottle saline and put the syringe back in her purse. She had set Jagan free from his prison, She had given him his liberation finally. The blooming sun of Margashirsha Pratipada was just rising. Now she would have to be a lot tougher than before for the sake of Mrun and for Soumya. A lot of dreams still remained to be achieved. She was responsible for both Mrunmayi and Soumya. She had to be strong for them. She wanted to see Soumya grow in stature and age. She wanted to see him grow famous and smarter than his father. She would not leave a stone unturned.
Friday , 8th December 2023 , 13:07 hrs.
Ajay Sardesai ( Megh )
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